Tuesday, July 15, 2008

Shidduch Resume

Sent by a friend.

Bracha Leah Stern
11 Kew Gardens
Lakewood, New Jersey

Summary and Personal

Date of Birth: 3-4-1989

Father is a yeshiva educated day trader who learns two daily sedarim in BMG. Has been previously investigated by FBI for fraud but never did any jail time. Big baal tzedaka who has been honored byBMG twice.
Mother is a retired BY teacher - youngest child with four brothers and 11 sisters all living off of the Lakewood General Fund and mechutanim from Brooklyn.
Other pedigree relatively clean, except for a 4th cousin, once removed who attended YU and is now a successful Ophthalmologist in Teaneck.

Parents looking for:
solid learner from Brisk or Lakewood with neither a history of college nor foreseeable parnassa plans who will sit inKollel indefinitely.

She is looking for the same

Father willing to support 10years @$75k per year, pending no stays in Otisville.

Dark hair with standard BY hairstyle; 5'4' withdress Size 2(Mother's size after her seventh child: Size 8)

Mrs. Goldberg of Lakewood (25% commission)

Dating History:
Has gone out a few times with no measurable success. Feedback from Mrs. Goldberg points to her having the charisma of a carrot.

Yearbook picture available if requested through Torah channels.

K-12: Bais Yaakov of LakewoodSeminary: BJJPost-Seminary: Online program to obtain teaching certificate fromTorah Umesorah.

Work Experience:
1996-1998: Counselor in several backyard camps in Brooklyn and Lakewood.
2006-2008: Teacher's aide in BY of Lakewood.

Hanhagos and Opinions Checklist (Based on Interview with Shadchan):
Tehillim: completes Sefer once a week while standing in line at Jewish stores.
Mother's use of Sabbath Mode oven: not any more

Rav C. Kanievsky or Rav Elyashiv if his line is busy.

Only with Torahnet filter on Tati's business computer.

Use of a community Eruv:
Never (she's looking for a Brisker, remember?!)

Indian Hair Sheitels:
Only if on sale.

Seat Belt Use:
No, unless pulled over by a female Police Officer.

Reading Artscroll biographies, Yated, Hamodia, and Mishpacha; challah baking; asking shailos to Gedolim about her shidduch difficulties.

Her Preferred Dating Venue:
Airport lounges without visible TV monitors.

Boys She Would Not Date:
Guys without BTEP (behind-the-ear-peyos).
OTD's who have straightened out.
Guys whose Rabbeim believe that the Universe may be older than 5768 years old.
Guys who read Making of a Gadol or any of Slifkin's books.

Ideal Wedding:
Chossen and Kallah adopt demeanor combining themes of Tisha B'Av and Yom Kippur.
Eyes-closed Tehillim throughout ceremony.
Kibbudim called up in Yiddish.
Separate everything including parking areas.
Simchas Chossen V'Kallah at 10:30 PM.
No Onlysimchas posting.

Shabbos Table:
White table cloth, no plastic covers, no ground beef or scraping at the table.
Would be willing to live in: Lakewood, Brooklyn, Monsey, Passaic (or Baltimore for a few years)

Music Preferences:
Yeshiva Boys Choir.
No more Lipa, Schwecky, or Carlebach.

Ideal Chesed Opportunities: helping put out cold beer and cholent at neighborhood Shalom Zachars; assisting with mass mailings from Oorah and Kupat Hair.

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